Green isnot usually one of my favorite colors, but, of late, it is one that I seem drawn to. The new small works of leaves, rocks and water intrigue...
Color of interest
June 30, 2014
Trust you are enjoying the new website. It is great to be able to share the work I have done and, as the weeks go by, the paintings I am working on....
My New Website
June 26, 2014
SpottedSerpents are not my first thought as I greet the day, and yet they have been popping up in my mind the last few days. I did a series of serp...
July 5, 2014
Sun to Fog
June 15, 2015
After a few days of sunshinebathingthehouse in golden illumination, this morning the pearliest coolness of fog covers the world hiding the hills. Mother, who was so determined to get up many times in the night, seems lost in her thoughts as she keeps trying to remove pieces of something that are not on the table in front of her. The constant repetition of moving her hand over the surface makes an odd rhythm of scratching sounds. She seems content to involve herself in some sort of rearrangement of her space, pausing once in a while to sip her coffee and gaze to the world beyond the window. Eating has been getting harder for her as the days pass. She can’t seem to process the way of getting the food to her mouth. Sometimes I have to help her drink after she puts her pills in her mouth or explain each thing she is eating and how tasty it is. Things that seem so fundamental to living seem to vanish from her mind leaving only a puzzle of what they mean or how to do something. I laugh and try to make it a game and pretend to not notice things and that seems to be best for her and probably me too. The house is stripped bare of many things and that makes the environment safer for her. Her walk has become unsteady at times and needs flat clear surfaces to navigate upon. She still gets lost in the house and I have to keep sight of her as she goes down the hall so she gets to her bath and does not try to find relief in a closet or room. She continues her story building when she sees something in her mind and explains what it is about but says she does not understand. Of course she asks me if I do. I have no answer, really, other than she does not have to worry about it because I am keeping track of it. That relieves her and she is off to some new thing.
I have been getting some more time to develop the new art. Images of ponds and fish swimming through strange waters, while floating rocks and mysterious lights adorn the surface competing with the reflections from the sky. The form of the human is visible and is becoming more solid in feel. Other works of ponds are finishing up and have a charm and beauty that makes me smile. I am getting better at accepting that the blocks of time I had to work before are gone and now the art making fills the spaces when there is opportunity. Finding balance with all the voices that call out for attention at times seems bewildering. There are so many good things to do and yet like in the garden you have to prune back to make what is the most important to grow. I miss the ability to go without worry about other things. Yet I have made the choices that now take more of my time and I am at peace with that. There will be time for other things later on but for now my choice is to provide for Mother and do the best I can with other things.
Hope you have found peace in your life and the joy of knowing that what you are doing is important for those you love. That you can sacrifice the expectations of what you wanted for the fulfillment of helping others. That you are not afraid of missing out because you have made the choices you did. That you see the beauty in what you are doing and feel the satisfaction of loving and sharing more than you miss what you had planned. That success is an inward achievement not an external one.
Trust you will walk thoughtfully and take very good care of yourself and your heart.